Friends, I must leave my beloved San Francisco in order to mitigate zombie outbreaks in other parts of the world. The kotsdrodenikel shields will keep you safe until my return. I have left you with almost a year’s supply of reactor fuel. Won’t you please ask the Mayor to top it off in the spring so as to prevent shield failure thus sparking the most terrible zombie catastrophe in recorded history? I would be most appreciative.

Now citizen, do your part to curtail the zombie apocalypse!

Send Mayor Newsom a message to show your support.

A zombie bar crawl? What in the world does that even mean? We professional wranglers never drink on the job. We must petition city hall to stop the importation of zombies except for research purposes by sober experts.